Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Stealing some more good advice - movies, music, etc.

I'm still reading "The Wisdom of a Broken Heart" by Susan Piver (I'm slow, because I'm also reading several other books at the same time.)  I've given up TV for the most part, except "Glee" and Jon Stewart.

Anyway, I opened the book to an Appendix this morning and Piver talks about the need to get out your emotions ("indulge it") and how great movies and music are for that.

Here's the list of movies that make you cry according to Susan and her friends:

A Beautiful Mind
Dark Victory
Field of Dreams
The Last Samurai
Stranger than Fiction (when Will Ferrell sings "Whole Wide World")
Anything where a dog dies  (I sobbed at "Marley" on the plane home from Spain last year...)

Big Fish
Dead Poets Society
E.T.: The Extraterrestrial
Fiddler on the Roof
Grave of the Fireflies (Hotaru no Haka)
The Green Mile
Hotel Rwanda
I am Sam
Life Is Beautiful
The Lion King
The Little Mermaid
Million Dollar Baby
The Notebook
The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
Steel Magnolias
Sweet November
Whale Rider

I would add to that list Terms of Endearment, that scene with Debra Winger's sons, that always makes me cry.


"A Change Is Gonna Come"  Sam Cooke
"The Dark End of the Street"  James Carr
"I Can't Stop the Rain" Ann Peebles
"I Can't Stop Loving You" Freddy Fender
"I've Been Loving You Too Long" Otis Redding
"There is an End"  The Greenhornes, with Holly Golightly
"What Becomes of the Brokenhearted" Jimmy Ruffin
"When I Get Like This" The Five Royales
"Whole Wide World" Wreckless Eric
"For Your Precious Love" Jerry Butler

Lately, I've found the song "I Believe I Can Fly" has been really helpful to lighten my mood. And "Vida La Vida" and "Tonight's Gonna Be a Good Night."  For some reason Aretha Franklin singing "You Send Me" always sends me.  And I like listening to Regina Spektor because she reminds me of my daughter.  Also Ingrid Michaelson.

I did something else Piver recommends.  Go through all your clothing and keep only the things that make you feel attractive and toss everything else out (bring it to Goodwill, or wherever.) That was actually fun, perhaps because I've been on the divorce diet and everything fits.

Organize your Netflix queue.  I do that all the time.  

Yesterday, I did an exercise that Mama Gena suggests, which really surprised me.  She said to write a love letter to yourself, the kind that you would love to receive.  I thought, "Ah, I don't want to do that.  That's just not something I feel like doing."  But I did - I wrote myself a love letter and it made me realize that I should accept nothing less than being fully and completely loved for who I am, and to be fully and completely in love with someone, for exactly who he is.  It's a powerful exercise and it made me realize how often I have settled for less, when we all deserve so much more.   



Zen Mama said...

So true, so very, very true. Never settle again my friend. Take that love letter you wrote and imagine the man behind it. Who is he? Write it all down and dream of him. He will come to you and when he does, it will be a powerful love. You deserve nothing less.

anniemcq said...

I want to add to your TV list. You may roll your eyes, and say NO WAY am I going to watch that, but I promise, you will laugh so hard and cheer so loud - Wipeout. We had someone tell us to tune in last summer, and it became a weekly event at our house. There is something primal in watching these people try so hard to beat the odds of this insane obstacle course, and fall, and get up again to try once more. And the shows hosts are hysterically funny.