Two years

It's been exactly two years since we decided to separate and we have finally reached a settlement agreement.  

Just like in the book, "Crazy Time" which said that it would take approximately two years to move through all the feelings, the grief, the anger, the fear, relief, excitement, all of it - it finally feels like a huge chapter of my life is over and I'm well into the next one.  

And the next one feels abundant - Zoe is here this week, she's seeing friends and we are enjoying our time together, the reading, the fabulous cast, the interest in the play, work, next week I go to Miami with my Mama Gena friends, all my friends who came to the reading and have given me so much support, Abigail and Karen - who literally pulled the reading together - Barbara and Lenore, Bella's beautiful floral arrangement to a producer yesterday - it just continues every day.  I can't be more grateful for my life right now.  And even though we had to walk Lucy twice in the middle of the night because her diabetes incipitis is causing her distress, every day feels like an adventure and I love this new life.  And just like "Crazy Time" said, it takes time for most people (especially women) to get their bearings again and move on, I feel that I have and that I continue to each day.  Not every day is easy and I wouldn't want them to be.  I feel alive and awake.  And spring is finally here! 

The problems of the world, the economy, the country, ecological disasters, Haiti, Japan, the Congo, journalists dying in Afghanistan, the Tea Party, the budget, the national debt, bullying in schools, gay marriage, all of that remains and won't be getting better any time soon.  I wish we could make all of that go away, but we can't.  But as the Buddha said, suffering is everywhere, no one escapes it.  We all do the best we can.  These two years have been challenging personally, but now it's time to move on.  And it feels good, it feels hopeful.